Hack for Emotional Strength

As we slowly enter back into “normalcy”, we may feel a bit battered and bruised. The world has been in collective hibernation, but not necessarily a restful one. Personally, I sense a fatigue, mixed with anxiety and frustration. Many of us are tired of not being able to live life normally, but we are also apprehensive about what the future will be. This has obviously affected how many people see the world, as well as their sense of safety.

In the previous article, I discussed the importance of protecting mental health, and the required discipline to make this a reality. On a daily basis, we have the opportunity to tune into what our feelings are attempting to tell us. For example, I work with many clients who have panic attacks. If you have ever experienced one, they are hellish. A pounding heart, roiling stomach, and racing thoughts are just a few of the indicators. But one of the things about panic attacks that I hear most often are “it came out of nowhere!” I always take exception to this. A panic attack often feels like it comes out of nowhere. But our body is throwing up red flags prior to a panic attack.

What is a red flag for a panic attack? We may have a scary or negative thought earlier in the day. This thought causes us to feel uncomfortable or scared. Maybe our body gets a little tense or we feel butterflies in our stomach. So we distract ourselves. We pick up our phone, we clean our room, we eat a snack, or we get back to our work. In the short run, we feel better because we have removed the negative thought…for now. Later, when all distractions are removed, that anxious thought and feeling returns, oftentimes stronger.

Why does the negative thought or feeling seem like it has grown? Why does it pop up when we are doing something relaxing , like trying to fall asleep? The answer is this: our mind and body are trying to get our attention. What does a little kid do when he calls for his mom over and over but she does not answer? He increases the volume!!! Your body does the same thing with worry and anxiety.

So, what can we do? Pay attention to your thoughts and your body’s reaction. When a negative thought comes up, notice what happens in your body. Do you get tense? Does your head or chest feel pressure? Just notice and acknowledge the thought, but try not to judge it. Take a couple of slow and deep breaths. Notice how this impacts your body and your mind.

This is a discipline and definitely not an overnight cure. But it does work. When we become aware of our thoughts and their connections to our feelings within our body, we decrease their intensity and their power in the long run. This is important because we become emotionally tough. We become aware of how we are feeling when we are feeling. This prevents us from getting overwhelmed and burned out. We pay attention to our body’s warning system and obey it. This is one of the ways to build emotional resilience.